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Learning How to Make Love (SEO)
By Kimberly Bock | March 4, 2008
I’m ranking a #8 for “learning how to make love”
I know. I get a bit bipolar sometimes. Ok, maybe more than sometimes. Give a girl a break. I’m improving ok? Sheesh..
Why would I want to advertise that I am ranking for “learning how to make love“? (lol, why would anyone?-wink)
This morning I had a jealousy search relapse. You know, getting the scoop on a chick that flirts with Bill pretty much on a regular basis (or was). By the time that some of you SEO/Mers read this, you’ll know who she is. No names need mentioned.
So I began this search and found a link and a blurb on the first page.
She is proudly advertising her high ranking for two words. One is porn and the other in a ‘flip-side’ and coupled order would be SEO. (not chancing it sry-wink)
I have no idea why it would make me jealous to think that my man (Bill Slawski, in case you don’t know) would have a flirty girlfriend that ranks highly for that query and is proud of it? I mean, silly me, ey?
Anywho, once I really thought this through I realized that there’s a post in all of this that expresses my true nature. Not a fleeting jealous post that could damage my relationship with my readers or with the most beautiful man I’ve ever had the pleasure of smooching with.
Get to the point!
I wrote a post about learning SEO to protect our environment. I’ve become more interested and aware of environmental issues lately and want to be in a position of activism as opposed to fruitless complaining coupled with inactivity.
I am ranking:
#10 for “learning to protect your environment” of 969,000 results
#3 for ” ” ” my ” of 348,000 results
#2 for ” ” ” our ” of 595,000 results
All queried without quotes.
When I added quotes I was dismayed to find that only 1 term brought 2 results.
It would be nice to see more of us learn how to make love to our health, our relationships, our earth, our childrens future, our environment.
Heck, even if you’re a selfish *ss think of it as learning how to make love to yourself. You’ll have an environment left to pillage tomorrow.
I recently wrote 2 posts (part1 - part2) referring to keyword importance. In these posts we uncovered some SEO oversights of 3 major corporations:
- Pampers
- Huggies
- Luvs
But what about the oversights of environmental sites? If SEO were to be implemented into green friendly websites maybe I wouldn’t be the one ranking for learning to protect our environment. They need to optimize their visibility in the SERPs, improve upon usability, and their content appeal.
Environmentally speaking, if we aren’t learning how to make love we are in essence no better than spammers and thieves.
It’s a schweet thing to visit analytics to find that you’re ranking for learning how to protect our environment or learning how to make love. But I’d much rather see a more deserving organization take my place. The environment is being destroyed daily and SEOs have it within their means to help defend it. It cannot defend itself.
Stihs and giggles for conclusion:
As for me: “learning how to make love” without quotes: position 8 of 16,900,000 results
As for Ms Uhem: “SEO (combined with the other word)” position 2 of 556,000 results
Question: Which is more difficult to rank for? (wink)
haha note: Bill got a silly grin on his face when he saw the SERPs. He said it’s kinda cool that his girlfriend ranks for learning how to make love. I got a lot of smooches for that one. Afterall, it’s schweet indeed to be smooched by the guy that taught me how to ‘rank‘.
Jealousy post?
Nah. No need..
It’s more fun learning how to make love
“Peace and Love” image by Zephyr
(original image text: “Make Love Not War”)
Topics: Controversy |
March 4th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Matt Hanson
March 4th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
[...] tagged how-toOwn a Wordpress blog? Make monetization easier with the WP Affiliate Pro plugin. Learning How to Make Love (SEO) saved by 1 others narutoboi92 bookmarked on 03/04/08 | [...]
March 4th, 2008 at 6:45 pm
lolzz its really funny and interesting topics our whole group is laughing after reading this.
March 4th, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Matt: Thanks friend. Great feeling indeed. I’m glad you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read so far.
I have visited your site and liked what I saw. I grabbed your feed as well.
SEO: See? It’s not even Friday yet and people really CAN laugh on the job. Laughing good. *-)
to both of you: Thanks for taking the time to comment.
March 4th, 2008 at 10:05 pm
Lovely post
On a side note: Do not use terms like “pr0n” or “w@nk” on your blog unless you want some strange people on it. You mention it once and they will find you via the long tail…
March 4th, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Ok, just received a Tweet from Jennifer Slegg. http://twitter.com/jenstar/statuses/766739882
So I guess I am a wee bit on the gullible side ey? Have I been officially been spammed by Matt Hanson? (removed his link)
March 4th, 2008 at 11:17 pm
Tad: Thanks.
Your message got stuck in spam filter. I almost didn’t see you.
Yup, you are right about the long tail. But saying those words are just so much fun!
March 7th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
you’re lucky to be #8 on that keyword phrase…I don’t think having a word porn will do any good to your site, but I guess it all depends…
March 7th, 2008 at 6:08 pm
It was still funny